'TEEN MOM' FARRAH ABRAHAM ENDORSES RASPBERRY KETONES, BECOMES HUMAN EMBODIMENT OF TWITTER SPAM

RasberryKetone.com

We asked for this, America. Now we're getting what we wished for:Teen Mom trainwreck/porn star/singer(-ish)/sad clown paintingFarrah Abraham has landed herself an endorsement deal, because of course she has. But what, exactly, is this Kardashian wannabe shilling?

Abraham's Kash-in of choice is Raspberry Ketones, a.k.a. the weight loss supplement whose Twitter spam clogged up your timeline a few months ago. The reality star even has her own ~signature forumla~ (the tildes mean it's legit!) of the not-at-all medically proven weight loss pill that she absolutely did not ever in her life use to lose weight. We know this because, well, Abraham's body looks exactly as it always has for the past 14 minutes and 50 seconds she's been famous (aside from the plastic surgery she broadcast on her nationally televised MTV show).

Truly, Abraham's oblivious trolling of the universe has reached an all-time high, as she is now the living embodiment of social media spam-and-scam. Congratulations, Farrah — you've joined the ranks of the savviest of the media elite, including Hailey Glassman, Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, and Hulk Hogan for Rent-a-Center. How does it feel to share the stage with such beacons of business?

Really, raspberry ketones really feel like an abstraction of fame itself. Fruity, mysterious, and an unfounded "miracle" solution for idiots! Some lab mice were fed extremely high doses of the raspberry chemical and a bunch of dummies jumped on the bandwagon hoping to cash in: nothing is really known about how long-term exposure to the stuff effects the human body. And for these "miracle effects" to take place you need to take way, way more than the reccomended daily amount. Just like reality TV fame: the illusion of actual credibility is created using smoke, mirrors, bullshit, and a willing body for the right price. Three cheers for the American Dream, you guys!

There's a joke about MTV, fame, spam, and raspberries in there somewhere, but you can just make it yourself.

Check out Farrah's ringing endorsement of the product, below.

WILL CHARLES RAMSEY JOIN THE RANKS OF OTHER YOUTUBE CELEBRITIES?

ABC

If you work in an office, a department store, a construction site, a taxi, or pretty much anywhere that forces you to interract with other people, you're bound to have already been hit with the question: "Did you see that Charles Ramsey YouTube video?" The latest in a long, flickering line of Internet celebrities, Ramsey is a bona fide hero who rescued three women and one girl from the home of an abductor, resulting in the latter's arrest. But beyond his bravery (for better or worse), Ramsey will likely be remembered for his vigorously entertaining persona, captured in this interview following the climactic episode:

Thus, a pop culture sensation is born. Already, Ramsey is the talk of the web, earning the attention of everyone with reliable Internet access. At this point, the heights to which this fame might spring is up for guesses.

YouTube stardom is a fickle thing. We've seen individuals explode into the conversation and then disappear just as abruptly; we've seen others pitch a permanent campsite in the lexicon, popping up in the form of displaced references for years on end. And in some cases, we've seen people actually make careers off their viral hits... however short-lived or flaky they might be.

The first figure that comes to mind is Antoine Dodson, another local news interviewee whose character quirks have earned him mass quotability since 2010. Fans will recall Dodson's diatribe about a home intruder in Lincoln Park, Alab., amounting to hysteria, reaching the ever sanctified platform of the Auto-Tune art form. Himself an aspiring musician, Dodson capitalized on his incidental notoriety to launch a series of live performances, a line of T-shirts, and even a foundation to fight juvenile diabetes. Although Dodson's career hasn't quite panned out with the promise it once had (in 2011, Entertainment One promised an Antoine Dodson reality show that never seemed to have panned out...), he's at least still a headline regular. Just this month, Dodson's admissions of rejecting his own homosexuality and embracing his identity as a Hebrew Israelite earned tabloid attention.

We also have more contentious examples. For instance, Ted Williams, better known as the Man with the Golden Voice: a homeless man whose impressive vocal abilities landed him YouTube notability in 2010, and a career as a voice-over artist for several institutions. Unfortunately, recovering alcoholic Williams also attributed his relapse to the extensive media attention garnered by his newfound prosperity. Williams' work load has seemed to fizzle out over the course of the past year.

But not everyone's fame extends beyond the viral realm. Earlier this year, YouTube met a homeless hitchhiker named Kai, who avowed to have rescued a passerby from an assault by attacking the perpetrator with a hatchet. The past has given us Jacob Isom, who intercepted the Dove World Outreach Center's Quran-burning event in 2010, offering a colorful account of his disapproval of the act of intolerance. 

With varying degrees of success to come from YouTube, we can't be sure where Ramsey's path will lead from here on out. But maybe, at the very least, as entertained as we might be by his comical yarns, we can offer a little more attention to the courage of his actions.

LAURYN HILL IS GOING TO PRISON FOR TAX EVASION AFTER ALL (FOR THREE MONTHS!)

Mel Evans/AP Photo

This, ladies and gentlemen, is why you should always pay your taxes:Lauryn Hill — singer, occasional actress, and current eccentric — has been sentenced to three months in federal prison for not paying taxes on the $1.8 million dollars she made from 2005 to 2007.

According to TMZ, a Newark, N.J. judge ordered Hill to report to prison by July 8, after which she'll have to spend three months on house arrest and nine months of supervised release. Although the singer's lawyer asked for leniency because Hill is currently raising six children (and doing charity work on the side), the judge decided the $970,000 she's paid since she pled guilty last year to tax evasion wasn't enough.

"I was put into a system I didn't know the nature of. ... I'm a child of former slaves. I got into an economic paradigm and had that imposed on me," Hill said, per TMZ. "I sold 50 million units ... now I'm up here paying a tax debt. If that's not likened to slavery, I don't know what is."

Well! That's an interesting take.

BEYONCE LYRICS ARE WORKS OF FINE ART IN BEYONCE ART HISTORY TUMBLR

Wenn/Beyonce

Peanut butter and jelly, Salt-N-Pepa, two peas in a pod, Beyoncé and fine art: some things are just meant to go together. We owe the last item on that list to a brilliant new tumblr, Beyonce Art History, created by the talented and witty Leigh Silver (follow her on Twitter@leigh_silver). Silver was the first to notice that nothing pairs with Destiny's Child quite like a Renaissance Era Madonna. 

Here are a few of our favorites:

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Head to BeyonceArtHistory.tumblr.com for more funnies. And Leigh, if you're reading this, we think "If I Were a Boy" would go nicely with some Frida Kahlo. 

MILEY CYRUS AND NICOLE RICHIE TAKE HAIR-RAISING RISKS: ALL THE STANDOUT LOOKS AT THE 2013 MET GALA

The Costume Institute's annual gala at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York City is arguably fashion's biggest night of the year. While stars gussy themselves up for the Oscars red carpet and let their hair down for the MTV Video Music Awards, it is at the Met Ball (as the event is colloquially dubbed) that Hollywood's A-List can showcase their high fashion know-how. 

This year, the Met Gala celebrates the opening of the museum's exhibition PUNK: Chaos to Couture, which tracks punk's transformation from a street style to haute couture. Launch our gallery below to see which stars embraced the punk theme (*cough* Miley Cyrus) and who played it safe. 

GALLERY: All the Standout Looks from the 2013 Met Gala

'STAR TREK' STARS LEONARD NIMOY & ZACHARY QUINTO FACE OFF IN FUNNY, IF HIGHLY ILLOGICAL, AUDI AD

Audi of America

Old and young Spock portrayers Leonard Nimoy and Zachary Quinto (of Star Trek Into Darkness) must really believe their character's mantra "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few." Anyway, they've certainly satisfied a lot of people's need for laughter with their new Audi ad.

It's just another day in sunny L.A. in which Old Spock and Young Spock are playing 3-D chess against each other on their tablets, when Spock the Younger decides to up the ante on the competition. It's time for not only a golf match, but a race to the country club: last one there pays the green fee. Along the way, Nimoy sings his famous rendition of "The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins" and tricks Quinto by reenacting his famous hand-pressed-against-the-glass "I have been and shall always be... your friend" scene. Check out the ad below.

Who said Vulcans don't have a sense of humor?

RAY HARRYHAUSEN, VISUAL EFFECTS LEGEND, DIES

Peter Macdiarmid/Getty Images

Long before the days when computers could bring any conceivable image to life on the big screen, we had Ray Harryhausen: a visual effects pioneer who championed the realization of breathtaking scenes, creatures, and worlds in the early days of Hollywood. The Ray and Diana Harryhausen Foundation shared the sad news on Tuesday that the cinematic great has passed away at the age of 92 for unspecified, leaving behind wife (and the organization's fellow namesake) Diana Livingstone Bruce, and a legion of grateful film buffs who have devoured his work for decades.

In the business since the 1940s, Harryhausen has contributed to some of the greatest, most important exploits in film history, most notably science fiction and fantasy. As a visual effects artist and technician, Harryhausen breathed life into greats like Mighty Joe Young, It Came from beneath the Sea, 20 Million Miles to Earth, and Mysterious Island. He went on to explore new creative ventures as a producer, crafting Jason and the Argonauts and Clash of the Titans later in his career.

Having assisted Oscar-winning special effects artists like King Konganimator Willis O'Brien, Harryhausen eventually received his own honor from the Academy. In 1992, the animator won the Gordon E. Sawyer Award for a career of technological contributions.

Along with physical prizes, blockbuster filmmakers like Peter Jackson, Geroge Lucas, Tim Burton, James Cameron, and Steven Spielberg have named Harryhausen as a major influence. Lucas as said that, 'Without Ray Harryhausen, there would likely have been no Star Wars."

Harryhausen's work on the big screen charted the course for today's vast cosmos of animation, CGI, and motion capture technology. Film has the legendary artist to thank for expanding the very idea of possibility.

Columbia Pictures

LINDSAY LOHAN TO SPEND FULL 90 DAYS AT BETTY FORD CENTER, NO EXCEPTIONS

Jeffrey Mayer/WireImage

After last Thursday's game of musical rehab centers, Lindsay Lohan has settled into the Betty Ford Center in Rancho Mirage, Calif. for the duration of her 90-day sabbatical ("sabbatical" sounds better than "court mandated treatment program in a lockdown facility," right?). And we're talking the full 90 days, no exceptions. 

People notes that, while most patients are allowed to leave the Betty Ford premises for select meals or shopping, Lohan will not be afforded such privileges. According to a letter to Lohan's attorney Shawn Holley filed with the L.A. Superior Court, "It is understood by the Betty Ford Center that your client is to remain on the premises for the duration of her 90-day stay in treatment." Turns out Lohan will be getting some special treatment after all. 

However, an intake counselor at Betty Ford clarifies for People, "We can't hold a patient against their will, we can't stop a patient from running away. We're not a jail. But we closely monitor patients via security and technicians 24 hours a day."  

According to People, the document also says that Lohan will be required to adhere to a strict daily schedule from 6:00 AM to 9:00 PM that includes meetings with a physician, nurse, psychologist, case manager, spiritual case counselor, family counselor, dietician, and chemical dependency technician as well as attend daily group therapy sessions and meet with a physical trainer. 

If Lohan was looking to spend three months working on her tan, she was sorely mistaken.